But here is my "Bump in the Road" and I need some serious comfort or happy words from my friends and family!!! The last 3 nights, during our family prayer in McKenzie's room (she always says the prayer) She has said... "please bless daddy be safe at work, and Mommy to GO to work tomorrow" After prayer of course I tell her, "McKenzie, mommy doesn't go to work anymore, i get to stay and play and be with you and brother all day now!" Which her reply is, "I want you to go to work, and daddy be here" The first night it was kinda silly, and made Jake and I go..uh weirdo...Then last night it really hit my heart strings! So I interrupted her mid prayer and said "McKenzie, I don't go to work, why are you praying that ill go to work?" her reply"So when you go to work daddy will stay" *sniff sniff* I looked at jake very troubled and said goodnight McKenzie, that really hurts mommies feelings, and she laughed and crawled into bed... Now Tonight, is jakes first shift back to work, so he wasn't here for prayer, and she did it again.."Bless mommy to go to work" I stopped her again and politely said "McKenzie that hurts mommies feelings A LOT that you don't want me here, daddy is sacrificing a lot so I can be here with you and Brady, and you don't want me here?" she then folder her arms back again closed her eyes and re-started her prayer. "Bless daddy be safe and work, and come home safe tomorrow, and thank you mommy be's here with us" I hope she understands it is hurtful, and that she really meant what she said in tonight's prayer, cause this is killing me! Almost to the point of "FINE! ill go back to work and you can go back to DAYCARE!" She used to CRY and scream when I would leave her at daycare to go to work, and that was one of the BIG reasons I decided to take the leap! I couldn't bear leaving her anymore, I couldn't stand letting someone else teach and play with my children.... Thanks for letting me vent. I'm really HOPING jake is right, he told me that she is only 3, that she doesn't know or realize what she is really saying... :(
it still hurts though *sigh*
8 comments:
it is a stage...nate tells chris ALL THE TIME that he likes chris, bit not as much as he loves mom.
seriously-all the time!
and the bigger deal we make of it the more he says it.
so know that she loves you and that she is adjusting to something new. and dont say anything. she will come up with another way to break your heart.
maybe in jakes free time (stop laughing) she and daddy can go for ice cream together. or maybe you and her. maybe she just needs more one on one time.
good luck
I wish I had something wise to say... but maybe it is just a stage because there is a change in the home? I think it is great that you did address it with her though.
Good luck I hope things work out. I think you are doing the right thing.
Send her over here for a day and I'll pretend to be a really mean mommy... then she'll BEG to come back home to you! =)
Really though, It sounds like just a stage thing..
Mommies get to be home all day with the kids, which also means they have to do all the disciplining... then daddies come home after a long day of work and get to squeeze all their love in before baby goes to bed.
Who would you like more? =)
Marley, even at 8, 9, 10, 11 months would be fine at home with me but as soon as daddy would come home, she would scream and cry and follow him around until he would pick her up or play with her.
If he was home.. she wanted NOTHING to do with me. If I came NEAR her, she would scream and run to daddy like she was scared of me. She acted like she hated me when he was home. That just Killed me!!
I was like, "what am I doing wrong?? Why does she hate me??" It hurt me soooo much!!
But slowly, she's come to love me EVEN when daddy is home and agrees to play with the both of us =)
I love you, and I know McKenzie loves you and I know if she had a few weeks of you going back to work, she would re-think her prayers =)
BROOKLYN seriously LOVES to be with Logan. I have cried MANY MANY times over this. When she is hurt. She says I want DADDY. It hurts my feeling so bad. Or I dont want you I want Daddy. I am like Hello I spend HOURS with you and a day doing fun things. Then Dadddy walks in the door and she just will sit by him just to be by him. Its so strange and my mom tells me she will grow out of it. I really think that there Daddy's are there little protection. I know its hard to say but I think she will grow out if it. I think its good you told you! Good luck!
Yes unfortunatly is a stage they really don't understand how to articulate a feeling, she just know she wants to spend time with daddy and maybe she thinks that the only way to make that happen is if you are at work if dosent mean she dose'nt want you around. She loves you and would probabbly pray the opposite if the roles were reversed.
Awww...I am no longer anyone's favorite anymore either. Both of my kids' hearts belong to their dad but I have learned to be okay with that. After all I am the one they want when they are sick, hurt, or sad. Maybe when they are older they will like me too. :)
Thanks guys, I feel better knowing it's a faze. When I did work and, Jake was home he watched her all day. Now He ALWAYS works and im always home. I'm sure she really misses her "daddy time" especially with sharing it with Brady when she does have him around :)
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